ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ ,-¨-. ___________________________________________________ _____ |¨-¨| /¨.-------------------------------------------------.`\ _=¨_____¨=_ | || Sal Stove Apr. Cost: 1000 GP || / /¨|¨|¨\ \ | || NOT ENOUGH MP || \_ \_|_|_/ _/=| || This month: Evk's Naughty Adventures! (Adult!) || / ¨=_______=¨ \ || What does EVK stand for? || |_ ¨¨¨¨¨ _| || Mini-Review: Wesley Girl 14 (Adult!) || ( ¨==_//¨¨/\\_--¨ ) || Listen to WrexSoul Rant! || |¨...||(=O||_==¨| \`._________________________________________________.'/ //¨¨\\\__\// / `---------------------------------------------------¨ ||//__ ¨¨¨¨¨__\\ h t t p : / / w w w . s a l a m a n d o . n e t \\ ¨¨¨¨¨/\ `\¨| /\ \¨\ /¨/ /\ \¨\ ||`|--. ... // .==. \\ //\\ || //\\ | \ / | //\\ | \ || ||¨\\ //¨\\ //¨¨\\ \\ ||__|| || ||__|| ||\\//|| ||__|| ||\\ || || || || || \`--. __ || ||--|| || ||--|| |#### |#####-||###| \#| |# ##### || _`¨¨.\ \\__// || || ||__/ || || #| || #| |# ||# #| |#_/# \\_// \\__// ---- -- -- ----- -- -- -### -- #- -# --# #- -#- ### --- `--¨ # # # # # # # #### # ### # ##### ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ I. What the Hell Is on Your Neck!? ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ First I'd like to welcome all of the new list subscribers. You can view previous list announcements at listbot.com. Secondly, I'd like to thank all of you who visit the page on a regular basis. My most profound apologies for not releasing new comics every day like I have done in the past and like I planned on. Well, I'll try to get the ball rolling again. At any rate, let's start this thing. This took longer than I had expected to churn out. While I was expecting to have it done around the 20th, it turned out that I didn't start work on it until the 23rd or so, and even then, I didn't get much done on it very fast. It's odd, because I really wanted to work on it earlier this month, when it was too early to release a newsletter. But then when it was about time to churn one out, I got really busy (with school, beating FF8, wasting time) and very unmotivated all of a sudden. Aah, thus is my bane. Well, I congratulate you, the few, the proud, the subscribers to Salamando's Stove. We will eventually be THE definitive video game comedy webzine. Assuming you can be definitive with such things. Either way, let's begin. ___________________________________________________________________________ Future Features/Articles - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ I've been toiling over a large list of things I could possibly do for the Stove. While there are a lot of things that are abundant and easy (review old games, rant about new ones), they're only passingly interesting in the big picture. I've come up with a bunch that I can work on, and it'd help if I got some feedback on which would be interesting to you all. One thing of note though, anything you see on the cover of the magazine (except the 3 page blowout) I plan on doing at some point. Unfortunately, I have a lot lined up so it could be a while. Well, if you have any other suggestions, feel free to send them in. Even better, if you can follow through with the suggestions yourself, you may as well write it for the stove (see the section on helping with the Stove). If not, you can start your own video game webpage. I won't stop you, and neither will my Ranma watch. ___________________________________________________________________________ Mini-Review: Wesley Girl 14 (Adult!) - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Disclaimer (WrexSoul): Evk, being the consummate dumbass that he is, played this game and thought in all his naivete that it was a real game. This doesn't make anything he says any less valid, but still, to think he actually confused this with an actual produced, released game and not some cheap hack someone slapped together. Sad, sad, person. Well at any rate, now that we've all had a big laugh@him lol hehe fag jk, let's get on with it. HA, a real game. Before we get started, the screen shots here have nudity. Therefore, if you're in the army and looking at porn will get you kicked out, I recommend you don't view this page. I don't know why I let Evk do this, I'm pretty sure it was just an excuse for him to post hentai. What a goober. Too late to stop him now. Also, boobs apparently lead to the breakdown of civilization, so if you are about to be sacked by Germans, you can always blame us. Also, this is the first members-only feature. Huzzah! Basically, because it has tits in it. Also, I'm going to tell you how to kill the president with a bomb. (note to those with no humor: joke) That's enough disclaimer. Let's do this thing. Okay. http://salamando.2y.net/magazine/ss3b.txt ___________________________________________________________________________ Listen to WrexSoul Rant! - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ I've been thinking recently about what niche exactly our page fills. It's obviously a video game page, and a video game humor page, but what exactly sets it aside from other 'ahem' humorous VG Pages? You know, ones like The Mushroom (themushroom.com)? (pardon me while I choke back disgust) Before Evk gives me some smart-ass answer like "we're funny," I'd have to say it's the format and the content. First off, we're using the all-too popular format that every page on earth seems to use. You get updates in the middle and links on the side. Actual content is on other pages. Whee. I'd actually like to find newer and more interesting ways of organizing it, but I find if I do, then it ends up being complicated and only marginally useful at best. Either that or it has some long-winded and boring "WELCOME 2 ORU PAGE DUDE!!!!" crap at first, spilling over into rant after rant after rant that I just don't care to read when I visit a page, especially after the first time. Also, this way people know what is the latest stuff and can compare it to their last visit to see easily if anything new is posted. Of course, the format isn't exactly what I've been concerned about. As for our content, we're very VG centric with occasional diversions (a couple of the features, for example, and quite a few comics). However, you know, we're not as G-rated or professionally done as other sites. This is probably because we don't give a shit what people think if they can't take a couple of swear words or a few chocobo-sex innuendos. So I guess that's okay too, especially since it's pretty consistent. We're not really surprising anyone, I hope, when they run into something like The Bar Job. Okay I do hope that, because surprise is good on occasion. So we're really trying to be funny without limiting our course and rather guy-ish humor. It could be worse, we could be like Jerkcity or something. Instead we're about on The Onion's level of coarseness. Whatever, I don't even remember what my point was. Oh yeah, our genre. I vote: Random Adultish Video Game Humor. If you disagree, send a notarized letter to your congressman and I'm sure you'll feel justified something's being done. Oh yeah, just so you know, Evk did say in reply to the first few sentences of this paragraph were indeed "We're funny." How predictable! ___________________________________________________________________________ What Does EVK Stand For? - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ This is a question I get asked a lot (the other one being "Did you take my mustard?" No, it was my clone.) Anyway, Evk isn't really an acronym, so it doesn't really stand for anything. But if it did, it would be Estrogen something Knight. What's the V stand for? Depending on the context: Vaginal Vestal Vertical Vestigial Velocity Sometimes if you feel witty you can replace the E and the K, but it usually turns out sounding stupid. But if you're trying to make an acronym out of something that isn't, you probably wouldn't worry about sounding stupid too much. So, if you ever find yourself in a situation where big guys hold guns to your head and demand to know what Evk stands for, you can tell them that it doesn't stand for anything, but if it did, mention one of these. Now you know, and knowing's half the battle, GI Joe American Hero etc. ___________________________________________________________________________ Mailing a Package (Amusing Anecdote) - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ This begins a couple of weeks ago, when WrexSoul mailed me a package containing the following: 2 graphic novels 4 CDs My Sidewinder gamepad 3 badly dubbed tapes, one movie Xenogears Alundra Hentai in my Pocket The first time I heard that this package had actually arrived was Tuesday morning when my dad told me "Oh, some package came for you yesterday, but I forgot about it and now I can't find it." He had put it on the bottom of the stairs, which is the area where our tenant who lives upstairs' mail is put. The tenant picked it up, saw it wasn't for him or from anybody he knows, and ... took it back to the post office. That means it got shipped all the way back to Oklahoma (my dad said "Its on it's way back to Japan already"). It cost $10 ship now. Anyway it's on the way back now, but I'm waiting for a chance to jump the tenant and feast upon his sweet brains. ___________________________________________________________________________ Secret!! Hidden Topic! - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ I had something to put here, but I forgot so instead I decided to put something Meklor sent me recounting my systematic otaku-related brainwashing. "Meklor's pages on RANMA1/2: I once was a child. I knew nothing of gaijin, nothing of hentai, nothing of the simplest sort of Japanese that you hear badly translated in various RPG's. Then I hear about ANIME. "Great stuff!" Says Wrex, and then I never get a good explanation out of him. (Either that or the voices in my head are constantly screaming and they won't shut up so I can hear him.) So I take a little of Japanese.... and get some culture lessons, a little bit of vocab, and I crave more. WHY? Well, its not the best method of communicating ideas, but it sounds both interesting and it is fun to learn. To get to my point, I was home for about two weeks with nothing much to do. Wrexman, he say "COME WATCH ANIME AND LEARN!!!! MUAHAHAHAHA!!!!!" I agreed and we proceeded to his room to watch something called "Ranma1/2". I must say, it is the most entertaining, enlightening (well maybe not enlightening), and humorous animation I have ever seen. I have watched over 13 episodes, and yet there are many, many more. I am no expert on Ranma1/2, but whenever I get the chance, I will watch." Wasn't that fun? Yes, I will brainwash you, too. On this note, I'd just like to say I really fucking hate .doc files. Get over it. ___________________________________________________________________________ Games We Miss - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Often I reminisce about such topics about "Where the FUCK is my next 2D Castlevania game?!". In that spirit, here is a list of what deserves sequels and why. Castlevania Symphony of the Night is a great game. So, what does Konami follow up with? Castlevania 64. I mean, really. SoTN is fun, but it shows its age. Let's have another Playstation game, fuckers. Legend of Zelda I realize that the Ocarina of Time is a sequel, but what a crappy one. Sure, when it first came out, everyone told me "I bet you're sorry that you brought a GayStation now!" but who talks about it now? Nobody. It has no replay value, and it's over too quickly. Link to the Past, on the other hand, was a fine game. Let's have a sequel dammit. And one that doesn't submit itself to 3d suckiness syndrome. Metroid Super Metroid was one of the best platform games on the SNES (If it wasn't for Megaman X, it would be the best period). So where's the sequel? Nowhere. On the other hand, if Nintendo DID make one, they'd probably fuck it all up and make Metroid 64, with real run-around action! Ooooh. Megaman X5 A case of Castlevania syndrome. Great game - so where's the fucking sequel? Some puzzle game How about a classic puzzle game? And I don't mean Bust a Move here. Dragon Quest(s) Fucking translate them! ARRRRRRRGHHHHHH!!!! ___________________________________________________________________________ My Encounter with Deuce (and the Jerkfans ML in general) - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ So Jerkcity finally got with the program and started their mailing list. It turned out to be much more lackluster than originally envisioned. The main thing, though, is that they started a two-way mailing list; basically an email BBS. This was amusing for a while as there were only a few people and basically only the funny ones posted. But then a bunch of dumbasses posted. And they posted really unfunny stuff. If you want an example of the standard post, allow this un-dramatized recreation: > T WREXSOUL GLAHGLHALGHLGLGH (FEELING YOUR ROSY BUTTOCKS FROM THE STALL NEXT TDOOR) > THIS SI PLUMPER THAN I REMEMBER. ALSO COCKS T EVK THAT IS BECUSE OF THE LUBE I WAS USING LAT WEEK!!1 NOW PASS ME ESOME SWLEET SWEET DICKS!!1 GHALGHLAGHAHGLAHGLAGH Yes stuff this bad and sadly, worse, was posted on a daily basis. It flooded our email boxes to the point that it was impossible to filter it out from my other useless email. Well, eventually the Jerkcity players actually started to post to their own list. I think rands only posted stuff dealing with the list and site. Pants posted random stuff that was funny, and would actually be good had he posted more. But deuce decided it was necessary to reply to other people's very un-funny email and call them cocksuckers, fat, or whiners. Oh boohoo! Insulted by deuce, which would be even worse if it were witty or actually insulting. So at one point I decided to reply to him since we never really found him very funny anyway (even in Jerkcity). So he replied calling me fat, and saying how I was boo-hooing my eyes out. Boy, I was thrashed by THIS witty repartee. I replied again insulting him some more (to which he never replied, big shock), but other people decided to write in saying stuff to the effect of "HSTU UP! DUECE RUULZ!!" Oh well, there goes my faith in humanity. (This is really just hyperbole because I had no faith in humanity to begin with.) So a word to the wise, any site which bases any portion of its humor on cocksucking jokes, don't sign up to the mailing list because it will be soon flooded by lamers. ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ II. Bonus Material ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ ___________________________________________________________________________ Counterstrike Comics - Backward Z ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Backward Z decided to make some comics about, surprise, Counterstrike! Apparently there's this page full of similarly drawn and topically related comics, and this inspired him to make these, but he hasn't gotten a reply from them yet. Oh well, you can say you saw them here first, but I don't know when that would come up in a conversation so you could possibly not. Well at any rate, download these if you've played Counterstrike. If you haven't, you are more than welcome too, but you won't share the humor value of the shared pain at the common situation presented. So get out of our club-house, fatty! http://salamando.2y.net/downloads/cs1.png http://salamando.2y.net/downloads/cs2.png ___________________________________________________________________________ Evk's Naughty Adventures (Adult!) - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Read general disclaimer above for Wesley Girl 14. Also, realize we won't be posting any more nudity for probably a long time unless you get us drunk or bribe us. As for the risque nature of Evk's Naughty Adventures, we were unable to include a couple prime examples of top-rate screen shots. After all boobs = devil. So, indulge in the little humorous scandal below and click. If anyone catches you, we'll agree when you say you were only reading it for the articles. Nudge nudge wink wink. Uh, yeah. Here are the two we had to leave on the cutting room floor. So smile, someone loves you. http://salamando.2y.net/features/ena/12.jpg http://salamando.2y.net/features/ena/13.png ___________________________________________________________________________ Fixed URL - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ The first newsletter, I think, I posted a ..wav file showing how NOT to pronounce "Evk." However, in my infinite wisdom, I posted a botched URL like a dumbass. And I forgot to fix it. So here it is, ready for your hot and ready ears, a prime example of idiocy. Idiocy beyond my own, that is. http://salamando.2y.net/downloads/evk.wav ___________________________________________________________________________ Chat Logs with Xeon - Meklor ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Okay so this is actually WrexSoul, and not Meklor, but he was the one who had the fabled Chat Logs with Xeon. So I will accredit this to him. So do yourself a favor and clickie below and read the amazing wonderful whigged out whack totally incredible super awesome nifty neato keen spiffy cool groovaliscious bodacious gnarly funky amazingly tubular logs. They're radical. http://salamando.2y.net/downloads/meklor1.txt http://salamando.2y.net/downloads/meklor2.txt ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ III. Up and Coming ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ ___________________________________________________________________________ What You Say, Vestalman?! - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Everyone knows Andrew Vestal. He was famous for being a pioneer in video game sites, running the now legendary UnOfficial Squaresoft Homepage. That long sold out and turned to a shell of its former self, Andrew has since moved on to different stuff. Well the giant that he may be, apparently running a groundbreaking archive of fanart and music doesn't make you all that knowledgeable. Sure, he may have run an UnOfficial Squaresoft Homepage, but little may you know, but he actually wrote a long article at one point about the history of Final Fantasy. Never before have we read such a flagrantly incorrect and erroneous article in our lives. In the future at some point (probably following What You Say, Xeonman!?), we plan on releasing "What You Say, Vestalman?!", an article debunking one of the most inaccurate and opinionated articles written, amazingly written by one of the most respected figures in the VG webpage community. If only reputation could save you from inaccuracy. ___________________________________________________________________________ Quizzes, Salamando, etc. - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ First things first, I plan on releasing a rather interesting quiz that Evk and I worked up. After a bit of JavaScripting, I'm sure I can get something interesting done and ready. The questions are already written up by Evk and myself, and I trusted in him to give smart-ass answers. With any luck it'll be as annoying as playing You Don't Know Jack, and without the benefit of being able to screw other people. Also, as a just plain fun side-project, I plan on making a Salamando that will float around and make smart-ass comments to you while you're browsing the page. He'll tell you stuff like how many updates there have been since you last visited, will shout random annoying quotes, and even play you cards. But this is all hypothesis right now, and will take a while to implement. But who really cares that much? I thought not. ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ IV. Interaction ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ ___________________________________________________________________________ Submit Ideas/Articles - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ As you see, we've been expanding rapidly as far as our current writing staff. This is good in several ways, namely being that I have to do less work per update, and I still turn out looking as good. So, if you have a good idea for an article or a feature, send it in, and who knows, I may be using your idea. What? You want more? Okay, fine, jerkface... If you actually do write us an article, like the previous suckers, I'll take to making your likeness into an FF Tactics portrait like the previously converted fools. Backward Z, Shale, Evk, myself, we all have our portraits done, and you can too. Hell, soon even StrykerX, Moogs, and other potential writing partners will have their lovely mugs plastered onto a previous mug, and then manipulated into the proper frame of reference. Then I suppose I'll also make your "written by ____" image too. And also, um,.... I don't know but I have the feeling this can be abused, but as long as I get an article, I don't care. ___________________________________________________________________________ Looking For Stuff - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ We are on the lookout for a bunch of stuff that possibly you can help us by either finding or sending our way. We will be greatly appreciative for this and will sing praise of your name across the land, and probably do stuff for you too (send you roms/albums, etc). If you know to get any of the following, send a message wayward. SNES ROM hacking stuff (change text, like translation patches) - Just think about what we can do with this. Other SNES ROM hacking stuff (change graphics, sound decompile, sound capture, etc.) - It'd be even better if it worked like it's supposed to. But yes, good if it does. Megaman X2, X3 - We need these in ROM format. Preferably not all fucked up. Unlikely since they seem to require special chips. Megaman 7 - WrexSoul had this, and then deleted it. Dumbass. (WrexSoul: LOST it, there's a difference) Any MM soundtrack (except MM1) - For adding to Salamando Radio. I already have Megaman 1 soundtrack. Lufia soundtracks - Gimmie gimmie! Einhänder, Tobal 1 - I had Einhänder but I deleted it. Your Salamando Radio contribution is appreciated! Willing to trade - Really. ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ V. Take the Soap Box ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ I'm amazed at the constant lack of feedback we get. Considering the large number of hits, it apparently takes a great deal of people who just visit to get a few who actually feel like sending anything back to the people who take soooo much time to make the page. This is your way of letting me know you're alive, and also if I'm lucky, Evk may let me out of my feeding pen long enough to stretch and let other people know I'm alive too. If you like what we do email us. If you don't like it, email us too, but I can't help your bad taste. Another suggestion to come across my mind: Bathe, people! It's not just a really fun game, but it makes you not skanky like you could be if you didn't bathe! Also, take pictures so I can feel like I was there while you bathed. ___________________________________________________________________________ Contact Information ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ WrexSoul http://salamando.2y.net/misc/wrexsoul.html pfrancks@ionet.net ICQ: 902240 AIM: WrexSoulll (usually inactive) \/. vvv Evk X Damascus http://salamando.2y.net/misc/evk.html Evk_D@hotmail.com ICQ: 11029633 AIM: ArchEvk (always inactive, unless @ skool) Rotting in the Gulag ___________________________________________________________________________ I'll Make you Cry Like I Did When my Dad Died ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ As if you've never been here: http://salamando.2y.net/ Do we even read this anymore?: http://avian76.virtualave.net/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=forum&f=11 Go and insult people deliberately: http://chat.msn.com/ Let it flow free on every pair of speakers: http://sradio.2y.net:8000 ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ IV. The Planned and Planning ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ ___________________________________________________________________________ WHAT A DWEEEEEB - WrexSoul ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Well I must say, first off, that I'm amazed that I got as much done as I did, with the help of many willing slaves. It may not have been exactly what I planned on having done a month ago, or even a week ago, but that's how whimsical life is, isn't it? I'm so fickle. Well, rest assured that we have a lot of stuff we just need to get in gear and get done, or if you'd rather, we can sink into not-posting a lot like we did last November or so. We've got the ball rolling and I don't think it'll stop any time soon. Hell, I don't know what I'm saying. So instead I will say 'Boing.' ___________________________________________________________________________ GOOD LUCK, MEGAMAN! - Evk ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ So, here it is. I never thought we'd do this much, or get this far. It's been a long strange trip. We went into the wilderness ~ into new journeys. And here we are. What will we do next? I guess that depends upon you. But in a larger more accurate way it depends upon what we feel like doing. Also, send us some feedback, for god's sake. "Excuse me! OK, I am a total reject. (sweat drop)" ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ Uh, sir... The movie's over. ___________________________________________________________________________ ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ "I'm stuck!" - the Critic This was a lot more efficiently constructed than the last newsletter. We got everything written and done and actually had a clue about how big everything was before it was sent! That may seem like nothing but in reality it is. So, despite half of this was written in the depths of the night when we were too tired to make sense, at least it was completed in a timely and efficient manner. I suppose the non-sense-making could be funny but I'm also too tired to judge that right now. So I leave you with a parting thought: When will we get the next fucking 2d Castlevania!? I sense you wish to know the answer too.